Society has seen that it’s impossible to enjoy life without sex since we’ve made it possible for human life to begin without sex not being involved. The Hollywood comedies like the 40-year-old virgin and 40 days and nights clearly demonstrate this. At first, there are several attempts by the man to have sex for the first time; in the second, there’s another man trying to go 40 days and nights without sex. Therefore, for quite a number of people in the current world, it sounds comical and implausible to tell people they can do 40 days or even years without sex.
And yet that is what God expects from Christians, especially those who are not married including me. The pity I receive and frequently feel is always exhausting. Other times, I feel like I’m not human since I have never experienced sexual intercourse which is such a basic human right.
It won’t be a surprise if the church becomes sexually obsessed just like the society that surrounds it. Just like sex is idolized in the world and in every environment, the church has idolized it within marriage making keen Christians who are in their 20’s rush into marriage so that they can just have sex. The most dangerous thing is they will later realize that all they have in common with the person they are now committed to being only desire. Early marriage has become the easiest scapegoat for those Christians who are struggling with sexual temptation and this leaves quite a number of individuals still wondering why there are still temptations even when they come back from their honeymoon.
Due to this, the church is required to ignore all the noise and begin embracing the concepts of celibacy and chastity. We need to teach the benefits of a single life and encourage people to embrace chastity. Or in an easy way, we need to start reading our Bibles all over again.
It’s not easy to see how the bible could be positive about the celibate life. The central character Jesus Christ was single and yet is seen as the only righteous human being that ever lived. In Jesus we see life, and he lived a life without sex.
Then there is the apostle Paul. If he had a wife, he would have never made any of his missionary journey’s possible. Yet he lived a celibate life and clearly expresses the benefits of this for the gospel. We all need to start embracing the same feeling in life today.
When it comes to the subject of chastity, we need to listen to both Jesus and Paul. In Matthew 5, Jesus set high standards about sexual self-control and Paul encourages this especially to letters written to the cities where chastity was not valued that much. All Christians should control themselves sexually both inside and outside marriage. This should be stressed again and again especially in the current world that we live in where we are always encouraged to follow our feelings.
We need not forget the fact that our sexualities can be both valued by our self-control and sexual intercourse. Love is communicated by the sex one has not had and not by sex one has had. This like that wife who declined to have sex with a colleague when on a business trip due to her love for God and the husband.