Being jealous is not always a bad thing. It is natural for people to feel jealous here and there. Jealousy does become a problem though when we decide to stay in jealousy or when we get upset and cannot get past it.
When jealousy becomes a problem, it begins to take over your life and put you in a place where you are angry, and you are bitter.
Some jealousy comes from romantic relationships and you can also feel jealous over things that people have that you do not such as careers, successes, relationships, and life itself.
If we think someone has a better life that is easier, chances are we will see only the bad in our life instead of the good that we have. Or we might think that our friend is a better friend to someone else.
We can also focus on how Facebook and other social media can trigger jealous feelings and when the worlds overlap and there are relationships that are confusing, we will sometimes compare ourselves to other people.
This happens because we are often insecure in ourselves and we feel that we are not good enough. We become threatened by those that seem better and we feel that their strength is our negative.
Jealousy can happen if we do not find a way to deal with ourselves and what we are feeling.
Romantic Relationships
If you need to stop being jealous, look at your relationship. Do you have trust and care for your partner? Do you respect them? Are they honest with you? If you cannot answer yes to all of these, chances are they have caused you to have insecurities in your relationship.
Being insecure means that you will be jealous at every little thing. This happens and sometimes it is hard to even see that it is happening.
Being secure in your relationship means that you can look at your experiences and you can trust your partner. You will not react in a jealous way and you will believe in the people that are in your life to love and care for you.
Chances are if you are jealous that you have been mistreated or you are dependent on others or have a low self-esteem. Ask yourself if you have these feelings:
- Emptiness or low self-worth
- Bad relationships with caregivers in your early life.
- Raised in an aggressive atmosphere.
- Being in a warm home.
- Being with people that were unreliable.
If you have an attachment style that is malleable it means that you have been in situations that have affected your life. You might need to see someone that can help you to work through your feelings.
Support
Find someone that you can talk to about how you are feeling. If you feel jealous, talk to your friend or family or even your partner.
Recognize It
Look at how you are feeling and do not feel ashamed of yourself. Learn about who you are so that you can fix yourself.
Learn
When you are jealous, you can learn from these feelings. You can figure out what causes you to feel that way and when you begin to feel that way, get out of it instead of staying there.
Let Go
Let go of the jealous emotions. Learn to deep breathe and think of positive things. Remember that jealousy is often made up.
Manage Emotions
Learn to be mindful of what you are feeling and learn to calm yourself. Learn to take deep breaths and ask yourself why you feel that way.
Detach yourself from these emotions and notice what brings up these feelings and what calms them down. Learn to process your emotions. Go for a walk or do something active.
Positive Traits
Focus on the good things about yourself and what you lack. It is normal to get jealous when we focus on our weaknesses. Learn to recognize what makes you jealous and work on this.